Vanishing Privacy
I heard this report the other night while I was making dinner. It’s about Facebook changing its privacy policy (again) and users’ discomfort about it (again).
The article is worth reading, but what jumped out at me was the remark by one user that Facebook really isn’t optional anymore. I’m not on Facebook and have lived to tell about it. It’s not that I don’t consider starting an account from time to time. But so far I remain Facebookless. What keeps me from it is the desire to clutch my remaining shreds of private life around me. So I’m one of many living testimonies that it is indeed optional.
The other remark that jumped out at me was a user’s comment about how personal the information on Facebook is, and how therefore it should be regulated. It may sound unsympathetic, but once a person put him- or herself completely out there, they can’t go back. It was a choice to entrust personal information to, essentially, a corporation — or really, to another individual, under the watchful eye and the control of a corporation. Now the only way to cry foul is to ask for yet another institutional entity to enter the equation and regulate the first entity.
A boy at church, listening in to my conversation with his mother a few weeks ago, was aghast to hear that I’m not on Facebook. It’s one of the givens of life for this generation. I felt like a real dinosaur!
I am surviving all right without Facebook. But I wonder: in what other ways have I sold my soul?
11 Comments
Dennis King
Hi Janet. I’ve had an on-again, off-again relationship with facebook — I feel somewhat schizophrenic about it. I think I’m currently finding a healthy balance with it. I believe that it’s valuable for me and others to have a distinctly Christian presence in social media. Almost all of my posts are an attempt to bring a Christian perspective to what people are talking about . . . for instance, the recent political campaign. I limit how much I comment about my personal life. You’re right — once it’s out there, you can’t take it back. There’s something about the immediacy of social media that I believe leads to the lack of healthy emotional boundaries. But I also believe that there is a place for Christians to have a redemptive influence on facebook instead of completely abandoning it to the other voices of culture. I certainly respect your decision because I have a great deal of respect for your walk with Christ.
Janet
Hi Pastor King. I’m a little embarrassed about how strongly I’ve felt about Facebook in the past. At this point my not being there is really just a matter of feeling like I have enough online commitment with a blog. I get to feeling stretched too thin if I try to maintain more than that. I know there are some things I miss out on.
To be online anywhere is to be monitored. I just seem to hesitate more where Facebook is concerned. I think it would be harder to maintain some of my boundaries about using real names and photos of my family, for example.
Sahamamama
I’ve never been on Facebook, I’ve never had a blog. I don’t tweet or text or ___ (the new thing that I’ll find out about five years from now, LOL). I do visit one homeschooling board, some homeschooling websites, a news site, and a few blogs. I like the blogs, I admit that. It’s hard to explain, but somehow reading about other people’s lives and thoughts and challenges makes me feel more… grounded. As though there is a commonality to certain aspects of my life — marriage, motherhood, home education, daughters, aging parents, aging selves, politics, the economy, enjoyment of books, nature, cooking, and other things.
Here’s a thought, I hope you can follow it: I sew about once a year (wink). It’s so nice to peruse the crafty blogs, and see what other people do, then come down to earth and make peace with my piles of unused fabric. LOL. I’m realistic enough to know that crafting is not my cup of tea — but it’s pretty, I love the creativity of it, and I’m so glad that other people enjoy the community of online crafters. :)
Another example: I read about preppers and all their prepping. I think, “Hey, next time I’m out, I’ll buy some more water bottles and canned beans.” I’m not a prepper, exactly, but maybe more prepared than I would be otherwise. No nuke shelter here, though.
Finally: I love nature, books, teaching my children, matters of faith. As long as there are blogs like this one (Yeah, Janet!) and fimby (Renee Tougas), I don’t need Facebook. Haven’t missed out on anything yet, but then I really wouldn’t know, would I? Blogs, to me, are like little glimpses of a person’s life — out there, somewhere — and for me, personally, the right blogs help me to become more contemplative. I feel as though I live more consciously, thinking about my choices and worldview more than I would have without having considered the other person’s POV.
I hope that makes sense. The sun is shining in through the lace curtains and is calling me outside, so I’m distracted. What a beautiful day!
Janet
Yes, it makes sense. I enjoy blogs for a lot of the same reasons. I’m reading the thoughts of people with similar interests and priorities, and it’s a source of encouragement… It’s rare to find myself in a group “IRL” with as many points in common as the group of bloggers I read regularly.
I have tried Facebook briefly — twice, actually. The last time was about a year and a half ago. For me it wasn’t very satisfying. I’m sure this is NOT everyone’s experience or it wouldn’t be so popular.
I sew more like once in a decade. ;-) I’m genetically incapable of reading a pattern.
Alice
I’m also not on Facebook. My reasons are similar to yours. I know myself and I think it could too easily become a waste of time for me. I enjoy blogging and that’s about all I can handle online. I know a lot of people on Facebook and I try not to assume that it’s less valuable to them than blogging is to me. But I also find it funny when I hear people talk about how it’s essential to the modern life.
(And sewing? What is that?)
Janet
:-) I think there’s a song in “The Sound of Music” about it…
Amy
I, too, am on FB (shared profile w/dh) and am mightily conflicted about it. I have thought many, many, many times about getting off entirely, but my main holdback is that a couple
Amy
Oops–hit post too soon.
Several local homeschooling groups have a private presence on FB, and that’s what keeps me coming back. I get local news/activities that way. Otherwise, I would find it much easier to ditch alt
Amy
Okay, I give up. Technology is not my friend this morning. Maybe you get a sense of what I’m trying to say.
Janet
:-)
I can see why you’d want to stay in touch with those groups! My daughter’s 4H group has a Facebook listing too, and I’ve thought about joining for it. Fortunately they still use alternate forms of communication, though — so I just get the emails and have been able to avoid Facebook.
Sahamamama
Do you think the day will come when groups ONLY communicate through Facebook? Will we have to have an account, in order to view the information we need for HS groups, 4H, and so on?
I sense a boycott coming on…